Sunday, August 17, 2008

Job Assessment

I must recommend this as the most inane tool EVER in the history of man for determining what your career choice should be. The truly remarkable part is that not only did it accurately correctly list my current job as the one I should be doing it also listed the other jobs I had considered in its top list. Almost creepy: http://www.careerpath.com/careerassessmentquiz/colorcareercounselor.aspx

Ah, late night debauchery...

It is always a problem when something is so offensive that you can't think of a single person that you can send it to and yet you are laughing your ass off.

Buying drugs online

So evidently, it is not possible to buy cocaine online: http://www.kirkbytimes.co.uk/alaughitems/crack/crack.html

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Cab drivers

When did cab drivers start getting so friendly in terms of saying profuse thank yous when you give them a tip? I remember a gruff noise that indicated that you were supposed to get out quickly so someone else could get in, not multiple, thank you ma'ams, over and over. Very weird.

Also very weird is that my credit card has completely miscalculated my bill, claims I overpaid last month by over a thousand dollars and that my current month's bill is three times what it actually is. I am slightly annoyed.

More thoughts from friends

"The best restaurant I know of is in a food court in Alexandria."

Monday, August 04, 2008

Rain

I love rain. Absolutely love it. Love to run and jump and play and stand in it and it just makes me happy to watch it. However, there are certain times and places where the presence of rain is inappropriate. One such place is the business district. All these poor people dressed up in their nice work clothes getting wet and messy and jumping puddles and avoiding the umbrella overflow because somehow no matter what you do with the umbrella you still manage to get wet somewhere. And I've really had enough. It's like we live in the middle ages. It is time to build giant weather domes over cities to protect people from inclement weather. How can politicians sit passively by when their citizens are needlessly exposed to the elements? We wouldn't have to deal with rain or snow or wind or anything else that is rather annoying. Isn't it time, America? Or at least those places with populations large enough for me to give a damn about whether or not they get wet on the way to work. I may have to take time off from my general plan to take over the world to get this done because if I have to wait 10 minutes for a cab one more time, someone in City Hall is getting it.

Friday, August 01, 2008

Layered Feelings of the day

I don't have the time to explain what I feel by layered feelings but suffice it to say I experience many different feelings and reactions and thoughts and experiences at the same time. Today, the predominant layered feeling is of being on my way to go see a movie in Paris. I lived there for a while and saw movies all the time (sometimes 3-4 times a week) but somehow my mind has managed to amalgamate all those experiences into some common elements, things that flash in the back of my head and immediately transport me, and I'm rushing along the Seine trying to make a film I should have left for 5 minutes earlier but as usual, couldn't get out of bed. And all of the city is rushing by as I'm walking at my break-neck pace, it almost feels like I'm flying.
And I never reach the theatre, of course. It's only about the experience, the part that is living, the part that reaches into your soul.

Pet peeve number 2

People who say they are going to call at a specific time and do not call at that specific time. Now yes, this is me being me (autistic, anal, bitchy, what have you) since for most people a casual, let's do the call at 8 means 8-ish. But if someone says 8 to me, it means 8, period. I am fully prepared at 8. No earlier, no later. And I have trouble handling the time that is being wasted while I am sitting, waiting for the call at 8, and nothing is happening. And these other people, totally calmly, eventually get around to getting on the line, on their own sweet time. And in the interim, I am completely stressed because now I have no idea when the call is going to happen and it could happen at any moment and I HATE hearing the phone ring unexpectedly because it reminds me of the alarm going off in the morning, which is the worst feeling in the world (short of being forcibly passed out via nitroglycerin, see earlier post and as a side-bar, I was wondering today if death feels like that and if so, I think I want to research a more pleasant means of departure because even waking up with a tube fully enveloping my throat - so you feel like you're choking to death - while I was supposed to be unconscious was a far superior feeling). Which brings up another point which is that I actually hate it when the phone rings. Or my blackberry goes off. Or there is any unexpected noise whatsoever. Oh and the worst, the WORST (because I live almost adjacent to a church) are church bells. Okay, play your bells to remind people to go to mass, alright. But playing entire songs for 15 minutes or a half hour? If I had the strength to get out of bed on a Sunday morning I would rush into their house of worship in a rage and do something inappropriate, I don't know, steal holy water or something. But you're allowed to take it, so that wouldn't really cut it. What I should really do is put a silencer on the bells like we did on the fire alarm freshman year of college (as an explanation, the building was too moist which caused the fire alarm to go off an average of 3-8 times daily, at times like 4 am, so we were really forced to eventually take action - not that the fire dept agreed with our decision but we talked them down from some massive fine after explaining the drama of the situation. The fire department does NOT like it when you make it so the alarm cannot actually go off. FYI.).

Pet peeve of the day

Doctors who don't call you back when you call regarding a potentially life-threatening condition. If I call and say, I was going in and out of consciousness for an hour today and I'm wondering what I should do, I think that deserves a call back. I'm not a bloody telemarketer.